October 2008 was a month that dramatically changed our lives and we will always remember. We started this month with the celebration of new life and by the end of the month we experienced the passing of my father. On October 27th we said goodbye for now to Mike Smith, father and grandfather, brother, uncle and friend. I have been trying to write this entry for a couple of weeks but my mind is so full of feelings and experiences it has been difficult to put into words. We are all doing well and I have a new perspective on life. That is often a cliche but it is really how I feel.

I have so many things to be thankful for and I could see God's hand at work so much in my life during this past month that my heart seems to be filled with joy even at this time of grieving. Jerry and I felt so much love and support from family and friends during our difficult time. We saw the hand of God working so many times. This experience has changed who we want to be and taught us about the love that has been weaved into our lives. We received love and support from family, Dad's friends, our friends and even friends of friends and family of family. My eyes well with tears when I think of how this love feels. I want to thank all who helped us in even the smallest ways. No one's calls or notes or hugs or meals or tending of children go unappreciated. We realize this is what family is all about. We include friends into that family. We really are all family because we are connected by a man that shared his life with all of us and caused love to be interweaved between our lives. Then comes a new life that continues to interweave that love even more. Brody Michael was sent into this world at this time for many purposes. I'm not sure he realized his first purpose would begin at 8 days old.

Fall is my favorite time of year and now I have more reasons to enjoy the season. This season has been a difficult but highly rewarding one. I will miss my Dad until we are together again. But I am also rejoicing that he is with his Dad and Mom and no longer having to battle the difficulty of this life. I know he is watching and helping from the other side in even more ways than he could have if he were here. Dad connected me, Jerry and our children with so many great people and we do not want to let those connections fray. Katie and Chad are at the top of our priority list but all of the family and friends will be kept close to our hearts.

I hope this entry shares a little of what has been locked inside for the past couple of weeks. My heart is full in many ways. Again I am grateful for all of those who touched our lives. I am grateful for our new little boy. I am grateful Dad got to hold him and that memory will be precious to me forever. I am grateful to have the knowledge that Dad is in a place free of pain and reconnected to his parents. I know his Dad wrapped his arms around him and they rejoiced. My heart will miss him until we can do the same.